name's Hamlet and I've got a tale
About madness, lust and a female
Dad's a ghost and he roams the floors
Lurks at night in Elsinore
Got a pale face just like Kiss paint,
normal you know this ain't
Something is rotten up in Denmark,
a sick mistake
My Uncle Claudius, his alibi is fishy
Suspicions of murder because
he's acting hella shifty
Frailty - thy name is woman because
my mom's on his D
A-N-I-S-H throne throne throne throne throne my Dad's
ghost tells me
"Swear (swear, swear),
to revenge my regicide,
Claudius iced me one night,
under my crown he tries to hide
So Hamlet here's your mission: use
your antic disposition
Make them think you're crazy,
bring justice fuse the fission"
Meanwhile my girl
Ophelia is goth as hell
Keeps a razor by her wrist,
rocks out to Soft Cell
This girl has got more issues
than Amy Winehouse
I'm like get thee to a nunnery,
I'm not trying to find
I'm an emo prince,
non-committal as as could be
You'd be non-committal too too
if you were flawed like me
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are
on my back and I've had it
I've got these players down from
Norway let them practice in the attic
I'll have them reenact the murder,
watch my uncle's expression
The play's the thing to catch
the king and teach him a lesson
My uncle freaks out at the play
I know he did it just like OJ
Can't 187 while he prays because Hamlet
won't play that way (nope!)
Confront my mom throw
her down on the bed
Because this Oedipus complex has
got me stressed in the head
Then I killed my girlfriend's dad,
he was spying now he's dead
I screamed at my mom while the
blood made the carpet turn red
See kings lose crowns but
princes stay intelligent
R. Kelly has girl problems? this is drama,
that's irrelevant
Opehlia bursts in throwing
columbines and daises
Singing songs about lost virginity - she's
honest but she's still crazy
We've got clowns in the graveyard
and I'm talking to skulls
We've got murder and incest,
who said Shakespeare was dull?
My girlfriend took her life,
and I'm like "Goodness gracious"
Her brother wants to duel
- Laertes is too pugnacious
My uncle dipped the tip of the saber
in poison (deul time)
Then he poisoned the cup that mom
started enjoyin' (tool time)
I got stabbed with the poison sword,
then I stabbed my girlfriend's brother
and then I stabbed my uncle and
we've all killed each other
To be or not to be? Well I guess
that solves that one
And I would have stayed in Wittgenberg if
I'd know that this would happen
If you're ever up in Denmark
on a moonlit night
You'll hear Ophelia's sad song
when the full moon's bright
Baby I'm sorry I messed up,
good night my sweet princess
May flights of angels sing thee to thy rest